Here's A Suggestion: Ban Answerphones
Answerphones make me nervous. I don't know what it is - maybe it's the fact that I'm getting no feedback as I'm talking. Or perhaps it's that any tiny mistake I make will be preserved for all eternity for the recipient to listen to and play back to everyone else in the room, over and over again, while they roll around on the floor with tears streaming down their faces, clutching their chests because they're all laughing so hard it hurts, and then they'll record it to their mobile phones and use it as a ring tone for the next four and a half years so that they can have the opportunity to recount, to whoever is there whenever it rings, the tale of the time Richard rang up and left a message.
Or perhaps it's just because I'm paranoid. Who knows.
Well, I think I just left one of those messages. I waited until 9:05 so that they'd be in the office, but no, it went to answerphone. I figured "Hey, how bad can it be", opened my mouth, and promptly spewed forth the least coherent stream of verbal diarrhea that I believe I have ever spoken. I knew I was talking crap, but I was on a roll and perhaps it would get better as I went on. But it didn't. I ended it by whimpering an apology into the handset before hanging up.
At least Orange let you re-record your message if it goes wrong. Just a shame this wasn't an Orange phone.
Comments
Whenever I leave answerphone messages and listen to them back, I am always really embarrassed that I sound like a small child! I think I must have a rather distinctive voice. Rubbish!!
Does not help when you are trying to hide!!
This makes no sense. Sorry, is the ramblings of a small child alone in a big house!
Laters potatasxxx
Seeing as I am banned from sending text messages, I thought this would be the best way of communicating with you! (And everyone else can read too!)
FYI: My mum was fantastic about the whole sorry affair. Apparently in a bizarre secret life she worked in a factory in Lewisham when she was a student and said it was horrendous and that I would hate it, so she was delighted that I turned it down!
So something is nice at least!
Laters potatasxxx
itz gr8 wn ppl shr thr ntm8 txts
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