Cheese Biscuits

My world-famous cheese biscuits

You'll have to cook at least twice as many as you think you'll eat. And buy new clothes. Because your old ones will not fit any more. Because you will get so fat from eating these. Because you'll eat so many.


Washing up


Helpful hint: double all of these numbers so you can make twice as much!

  • 140g flour (plain or self-raising, doesn't matter)
  • 115g butter
  • 115g grated cheddar cheese
  • 30g potato crisps (one bag)
  • 1 egg yolk (the yellow bit)
  • 1/4 teaspoon of salt, plus some for sprinkling
  • 1/4 teaspoon of mustard powder (or just under 1/2 teaspoon of mixed mustard)
  • Pinch of cayenne pepper
  • 1-2 teaspoons of water


  • Scales
  • Mixing bowl
  • Oven
  • A board
  • Rolling pin
  • Knife or shaped cutter
  • Two or three baking trays (or one and wait)
  • Wire rack


  1. Put the flour, salt, mustard powder and cayenne pepper into a mixing bowl
  2. Rub in the butter - cut it up smallish, lob it into the bowl a bit at a time, push it around with a fork for a bit and rub it between your fingers until it resembles bread crumbs (imagine untoasted toast crumbs, only bigger)
  3. Add the cheese and the crisps, and stir well to mix
  4. Stir in the egg yolk and enough water to give a stiff dough. Careful with the water though - too much, and it'll get too sloppy and pastey
  5. Knead lightly until smooth
  6. Get some flour and sprinkle it over your board
  7. Roll out the dough onto the floured surface
  8. Cut out about 50 small rounds or squares or shapes (about 5mm deep), or shapes if you're that way inclined
  9. Place on a greased baking tray (rub butter on it)
  10. Bake in a pre-heated oven, 200c for 12 to 14 minutes. They'll be golden brown when done
  11. Sprinkle with salt, and cool quickly on a wire rack

Eat very quickly before they get cold.